Coronavirus Changes Single Mom’s Life
Dallas entrepreneur and mother Ashley Nicole photographed with her daughters.
Image Provided By: Ashley Nicole
As we approach the one-year mark of a devastating global health crisis, it seems that many people are still not quite as serious about safety, as Covid-19 is vicious about taking lives.
For entrepreneur and single mother Ashley Nicole, she can only hope to some day restore a degree of normalcy in her life after a battle with Covid-19.
In mid-August, Nicole found herself suffering from symptoms of what appeared to be a normal cold. She treated herself for coughing and congestion, while continuing to work. The 35 year old is a photographer, a branding consultant and she runs her own magazine. By summer, the pandemic had already impacted many of her efforts as a business owner, but even on those days she didn’t have a photo shoot or a meeting, she was able to create web content from home.
Like many small business owners, Nicole did receive financial assistance from the government, but it was short-lived. Always poised with the mindset of a responsible mother, she couldn’t languish in the fact that assistance was running out. She had to do something to keep her household afloat.
“When the unemployment benefits ran out, I found myself going to the tax free sales, trying to prepare for the inevitable with limited funds,” she says.
Many of the school districts in the DFW area were still requesting uniforms and supplies as the extended summer vacation neared an end. Nicole’s two daughters are 11 and 17 and the plan was for them both to transition from private schools to public schools in Mesquite and Dallas respectively. Fortunately both girls were able to begin school virtually and with the help and guidance of their mother – they both got off to successful starts.
With limited funds, a new style of academic learning and in the midst of a global pandemic – Nicole still had no idea of what was on the horizon. Her energy was off and she felt herself beginning to worry.
Everything changed on September 4, 2020.
In late August, the positive numbers briefly declined in Dallas and schools introduced the option for students to return to in-person learning. Nicole was hesitant to allow her daughters to return, because by September 9, 2020 – both her and her youngest daughter had tested positive for Covid-19.
“I had difficulty breathing,” she recalls. “I had both hot and cold sweats, chills and I was so congested.”
What Nicole never had, however, was a fever. Throughout the early months of the pandemic, “the fever” was what health officials appeared to rely on most heavily when concerning Covid-19 diagnosis.
On top of the discomfort, Nicole was losing money. There was no more help from the government. There was no reason to believe that another stimulus check was coming. The mother, who works multiple jobs for her multiple streams of income, was losing money. Fortunately for Nicole, she hired a team back in April and that team was able to maintain many of her duties, but nevertheless – Nicole was at home, in bed and losing income.
For months leading up to her positive test, Nicole is adamant that she refrained from any extra activities because she was so afraid of getting sick. She kept her children safe at home. She took special precautions when she needed to run errands. But there was one photography job that she just couldn’t turn down.
Her savings account was diminishing and the odd jobs just weren’t carrying the weight of her financial obligations. A friend appeared on Facebook, promoting his large photo booth business.
“In my mind, such a booth meant that wherever we set up would have lots of space,” explains Nicole.
The client said, “I’ll pay you anything.” Nicole offered her quote and the woman gladly accepted.
“I was just laying in bed that Saturday night when my friend called,” she recalls. “Three hours later, I was pulling up to the address.”
To her surprise – the address was not an event space, but a home. Awaiting them inside was a large party. As it turns out, the homeowner was determined to give her husband a successful birthday party. With thoughts of upcoming rent and school in mind, Nicole, with her 17 year old in tow as her second shooter (assistant) – entered the home. They both wore masks. In fact, every vendor in the home wore a mask, including the caterers, the cigar distributors, the casino table facilitators and the DJ.
None of the 50 or so partygoers wore masks.
The means by which she contracted Covid-19 replays in her head over and over. She revisits the CDC guidelines daily.
“Maybe one of the party guests unknowingly spit in my direction,” she ponders. “Perhaps a spec of spit or sweat hit the camera that rested around my neck and lay on my stomach and then I put the camera up to my face.”
After several hours of shooting the party that Saturday night – Nicole and her daughter stopped for gas on their way home. Her daughter pumped the gas, while she sat in the car. By Sunday morning, Nicole’s throat was very itchy.
On August 23, she posted a picture on Instagram of a straw poked into a lemon with a caption that read: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Little did she know that message would be for her to value in the coming weeks. She lost a maternity client in a car accident. She was in the beginning stages of Covid-19 and didn’t know it. And her grandmother had to have emergency heart surgery.
“I didn’t know that everything that day would spiral out of control,” she says.
With both of her daughters attending school virtually, Nicole continued to do the best she could to keep them all safe at home. All three would eventually visit the family doctor at Dallas’ Parkland Hospital for a nasal swab test.
“We were able to quarantine immediately after the diagnosis,” she recalls.
One morning, Nicole remembers waking up with a swollen face. It felt twisted and uncomfortable. Unsure if she had experienced a stroke or the like, she took herself to the emergency room. Because her oxygen levels were normal, she was sent home.
The next night, she returned to the emergency room with hives. She saw the same ER doctor and nurses. This time, she was put on steroids. Her body didn’t respond well, but most damaging was the lack of information she received from the medical staff. Apologetically, they just had no real explanation to offer her about what the coronavirus was doing to her body.
“I wasn’t able to return to my normal activities. It felt like death. My heart was beating at an uncomfortably fast rate. Just walking around made me nervous.”
Much of the coming days were spent calling the emergency room, her primary care doctor and the nurse help lines, asking what she could do to alleviate some of her pain. Unfortunately they weren’t able to give much advice. The virus was still very new and they simply didn’t have the answers.
She wasn’t eating; comfortably taking a bath, and she often found herself unsure of the day or the time of day.
“All you know is that you have Covid and you hope you wake up.”
Aside from being overweight, Nicole doesn’t have any other underlying conditions. She treats her body well and is a very active adult. For weeks, she dealt with hives every single day. She continued to take the steroids each day. To this day, she can still not smell certain things and she still can’t taste many foods.
Even after quarantining for longer than the suggested two-week period, she had to make the decision about her children going back to school.
“We were wearing masks and gloves in our home. I was wiping down my girl’s laptops and wiping the walls. It was all so surreal. I was trying to help my child learn French for her new class with a mask on.”
Nicole chose to be very transparent with her daughter’s Dallas school about her having contracted the virus.
“I told them that both of us have tested positive for Covid-19,” she says. “They didn’t seem worried about it at all.”
The school said that since the young girl had already been exposed and quarantined for 14 days that she could return to campus. There was no request for a negative test. School personnel almost insisted that she return, suggesting that it was imperative for her to take a district benchmark test for the purpose of collecting data. Nicole, a bit taken aback by the response elected to email her concerns.
“I chose not to send her to campus because I didn’t think it was fair for her to be around other children who weren’t sick or maybe asymptomatic. My child still didn’t have her sense of smell at this point. She’s 11, she could accidentally touch someone or share a classroom supply,” says Nicole. “A number of unintentional things could happen among children to ignite a spread - she could give someone a hug.”
After her chain of emails, the school district began sending emails stating that they would administer the test online.
To date, Nicole has lost count of the number of times she has been told that this (Covid-19) is a new virus and we just don’t know enough about it by medical professionals.
It has all been exhausting to say the least. ER doctors told her to direct her questions to her primary doctor. Her primary doctor offered better, yet minimal explanations. One bit of information that still baffles Richardson – she was told not to get retested, because then she couldn’t go back to work.
“I definitely questioned them,” she says. “Why? Will it come back positive? I was told that the antibodies stay in your system for about 30 to 60 days, so the hospital wouldn’t be able to give me a letter or notice saying that I’m negative.”
For Nicole, a woman who works for herself – this wasn’t such a hard blow. But what exactly did this mean for the millions of Americans returning to school and work after 14 days of quarantine? Nicole says she found herself simply amazed by the conflicting information she received from the doctors and nurses.
By early October, Nicole says her household had a strict routine working. Her grandmother had successful heart surgery and she was the only family member able to take care of her, so she had to make things work. Armed with an abundance of masks, sanitizer, precautions and prayer – Nicole would take her grandmother to several follow-up appointments with the doctor. Her oldest daughter was able to return to in-person school, driving the family’s only car and entering and exiting the home without too much interaction.
“Here we are closing out November and I still get hives. Fog memory is still an issue for me and for the first time in my life I’m dealing with true anxiety,” she shares. “I know that nothing lasts forever – not even my life, so I’ve decided to take everything easy. My clients have to deal – they wear masks and so do I. The world just has to deal.”
Being out in the public has been especially hard for Nicole. She has dealt with bouts of depression. Two family members and a close friend have perished due to Covid-19.
“I still see so many people not wanting to wear masks, out partying and just being reckless,” she says. “I was never out partying. I was simply working and trying to provide for my children.”
Even though she finds herself overly cautious and borderline paranoid these days about smudges on the doorknobs and particles in the air – Nicole says she is just thankful to be alive to tell her story.
“I thank God for the ram in the bush.”
