Abortion is the Business of ONE
Imagine for a moment that you are locked inside of a room with your greatest fear, your most troubling memory, your biggest mistake or your lifelong phobia. Close your eyes and visualize it – whatever it may be. Someone has placed you in this room, with this “thing,” this “person,” this “memory” or this “idea” that you dread beyond explanation.
It would be a room full of unleashed dogs for me. I don’t like any dog, anywhere that is not restrained.
Imagine being so uncomfortable that you feel betrayed, fragile and violated. Even if what bothers you means less than nothing to everyone else around you – this thing, this experience, this moment paralyzes you.
What do you feel yourself wanting in this moment?
Other than being freed from the captivity of this moment – you may want whoever is responsible to be punished. Or maybe you just want to be free of this burden to move on with your life – no retribution needed.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
My next-door teacher-neighbor raised his voice at his class and one of my newest students jumped so frantically that she knocked her spiral and pen from her desk. When she lifted her head up from retrieving her supplies, she had tears in her eyes. She immediately asked to go to the restroom.
In that moment she wanted to be free from anything that remotely reminded her of her worst memory – being raped. In that moment she simply wanted to get away. My coworker hadn’t hurt her – he was actually the nicest man in the school, but even the subtlest aggression from a male figure sent her emotions into an uncontrolled tremor.
She was a child. She had been violated. She never chose sex. She never chose to lose her virginity – it was taken from her. Because she’d had only a few irregular menstrual cycles in her life – like many girls, she wasn’t quite sure what to expect from her body month to month. So when her cycle skipped two months and she gained a little weight – she thought nothing of it.
She was a child. She was raped. And now she was pregnant – nearly too far along to safely abort her rapist’s baby. According to a new Texas Law, had she reached six weeks in her pregnancy – she would be too far along to legally abort her rapist’s fetus.
No woman wakes up and decides she wants to make a life of aborting fetuses. Only an arrogant and insecure male would create and disperse such a narrative. Sometimes, however, “no longer being pregnant” is a woman’s only way out of captivity. A teenager, who never willingly engaged in sex doesn’t walk the halls of her high school conjuring up ways to abort a fetus. Sometimes, however, “no longer being pregnant” is the only way to save her emotional and mental life.
But our leaders don’t care about the children who are already alive and moving about the State of Texas, only their unborn children.
Fifty Shades of Control took on a new, dark and even more demented dimness in Texas this week. We are actually in the most unsightly moments of a modern-day War on Women.
A Texas law banning most abortions after about six weeks of pregnancy went into effect as Tuesday transitioned into Wednesday. The law bars abortions once cardiac activity can be detected in the embryo. This typically occurs around the sixth week of pregnancy.
According to the new law, the only exception to be made will be if the pregnancy can kill the expectant mother. Incest and rape do not matter, as far as this new law is concerned. To add insult to an already discriminatory practice – the state is incentivizing reports of attempted abortions. That’s right, a father can rape and impregnate his daughter and then report her for $10,000 if she attempts to terminate the pregnancy.
In case my stance has already been dismissed by the “pro-lifers” – I am not pro-abortion, but very much pro-choice. I have not been pregnant or worried about possibly being pregnant a day in my life. I have, however, seen the trauma in the ability to choose being stripped from our most valuable demographic on earth – women.
I have many questions, but I’m afraid we already know the answers.
Why is it so important for men to control women’s bodies? Some of the very wealthy white lawmakers who are behind this new law have the financial means to pay for abortion after abortion if and when unwanted pregnancies threaten their respective household, political campaign or the like.
Where is the logic in forcing a woman to have a child she doesn’t want? Of course they’ll say – “give the baby up for adoption – there are plenty of couples who will raise the child.” Well, the average adoption in the United States can cost in excess of $40,000. Unfortunately not every child put up for adoption or in foster care is placed with a family.
And, oh the irony of trying to force unwanted pregnancies to continue during the height of a pandemic, when the mental health of many potential parents is dithering.
The bottom-line- men have no business enacting laws on women’s bodies.
If you are not a woman – a woman’s reproductive rights and/or her decision not to ever reproduce is not your business. If you are a woman, who supports such rights being stripped from a fellow woman - shame on you.
Of course, rape is not the only reason women want to terminate pregnancies.
Sometimes a night of passion, failed birth control or simply a change of heart can be the root of a woman’s desire to stop conception (Plan B) or terminate a pregnancy. I know, I know that bothers those of you who like the idea of “using women for sex,” but are repulsed by the thought of “women using sex.”
The idea of being the sole provider for a completely dependent child may be frightening to any woman. Remember, men get to choose if they want to stick around and raise children. Sometimes men choose not to do so, no matter how many children they’ve created in various households. A woman who keeps her child and attempts to raise said child is susceptible to all sorts of persecution and ridicule when she makes mistakes or falls short of the parenting rules set forth by society. When she asks for financial support – she is ridiculed. When financial support is provided – she is ridiculed. Some women simply don’t want to deal with any of it, and that should be her right.
Women of today have career goals that women 100 years ago could only dream of. If she chooses not to have a child, so as not to interfere with her career advancement – that too should be her right.
The truth is many men find comfort in control.
Imagine if it were illegal for a male to have sex until he actually understood sex to be more than just penetration. Imagine if it were illegal for a male to have sex before he achieved a certain intellectual criterion. Imagine if all teen males were required to have a reversible vasectomy until it was proven that he could financially support a child.
When a teen girl gets pregnant and wants an abortion – society tells her she made a mistake or “shouldn’t have been having sex,” as opposed to acknowledging that she may not be able to support a child (financially, emotionally, etc). And if she has that child and struggles – society beats her down even further.
I guarantee you that just the mere thought of placing jurisdiction on the male body has made many readers uncomfortable. Archaic law and practice have done great damage on our society. It has unfortunately convinced both men and even many women that women are to be controlled, while men are to live according to their desires.
For the Bible-Toting only for the purpose of Quoting and Finger-Pointing “Christians,” – it is YOUR book of life God intends to ask you about – no one else’s. Let the woman who terminates her pregnancy explain that to God.
There are more than seven million documented women of childbearing age in the State of Texas. To each of you: whether you realize that you were signed up for war or not – I share this…
Another law went into effect Wednesday, one that that allows Texans to carry a gun without a license. I would encourage all women to safely carry a gun and make sure to shoot your rapist in both of his reproductive rights.
